Producer: CRL
Retail Price: £7.95
Author: Delta 4

The name behind DELTA 4 is one Fergus McNeil. He brought you Robin of Sherlock and Bored of the Rings and now he's waylaying us with his latest offering - The Boggit, Bored Too (two, that is). Regulars to the column will remember how I enjoyed both of Fergus's earlier offerings but wondered how universally funny the jokes actually were. In The Boggit, the comic genius's talent has been trained, focused and profitably directed towards the one theme - taking The Hobbit computer game to the cleaners (although the thought of cleansing isn't quite the right analogy here)!

Everyone who has played The Hobbit will find something to laugh at here, and even Tolkien illiterates will realise something funny's going on as Bimbo struggles with supposed friend and foe alike to try and emulate the exploits of Bilbo in the original. This game is awarded a SMASH not just because it is amusing at the expense of a game and a theme familiar to everyone but due to its standing as an adventure - the game reads well, plays well, and the presentation is slick and polished to a tee.

A comfortable tunnel-like hall is Bimbo's home and there's the familiar round green door set in the middle of a very familiar picture not unlike the first frame of The Hobbit (remember how DELTA 4 mimicked Robin of Sherwood pictures in their last spoof)? OPEN CHEST and 'Bimbo.. couldn't quite see inside.' Any adventurer worth his salt will recognise a prompt to action here and so it is that the intrepid explorer clears the first hurdle, but only after dodging the very real threat posed by some glamorous milk choccies accompanied by a card and delivered at great risk. Typically the chocs are explosive and are delivered by none other than that conniving rascal Grandalf: 'Suddenly, there was a resounding crash, and Grandalf tarzaned in through the window, collapsing elegantly on the floor beside Bimbo. He hastily fumbled about in his robes for something, then placed a box of chocolates and a card carefully on the carpet before scrambling out through the now broken window'. Much longer passages than this pop up throughout the adventure and because they are so well-written add immensely to the fun and atmosphere of the game.

Assuming players can suss the combination lock on the green door and side-step the exploding chocolates they might like to explore the Boggit-hole with the super EXAMINE command. As an example of how full this adventure is let's take the toilet area which one might have assumed to be a bit of a backwater (no rude joke intended). Using this command we learn how the toilet looks a bit dubious, how the sink contains some ancient mouthwash stains, the medicine cabinet to be securely welded shut, and the floor tiles to be a bit wet but otherwise uninteresting. This is an aspect of adventuring I enjoy very much - the idea that there are many nooks and crannies to explore which may or may not have some direct bearing on the outcome of the adventure. Using the toilet gives rise to the following gem: 'Bimbo tries to make use of the toilet. Suddenly, a huge, bottle-shaped monster reared up out of the bowl and bit him horribly! 'See you soon' it gurgled unpleasantly and sank out of sight'. Before I leave this area of the adventure, a tip to those reading: if you are having difficulty with the combination and can't get out of this bit, type HELP and take the advice literally.

After meeting up with the dwarves, Bimbo is thrust into the middle of a TV quiz show, compered by Grandalf, which poses the question, 'Bimbo Faggins, we have here a 14th share of Thorny's dwarvish treasure. How much do you think it's worth?' The prize for getting this question right is not a breakfast tea service but an extended camping holiday which sounds remarkably like one of those nasty adventure quests with dragons and the ilk. But first Bimbo must get through his hangover from drinking too much dwarvish ale, and Grandalf and Thorny the Dwarf must settle their differences after an argument and fight over Grandalf's tricking Thorny's dad, Drain, out of a key and map leaving the old demented dwarf incarcerated in the necromancers' mental hospital. This imposing building can be found along with many other such sillies on the inside cover of the inlay.

No opportunity has been missed to poke fun at the Tolkien map. Old ford lies opposite a picture of a new Ford uncannily like a Ford Sierra, a new forest trunk road goes nowhere but almost reaches the municipal golf course, and even Ludlow gets a mention along with the likes of Weeble World and The Great River Anadin.

I'll leave you with the first verse of the dwarves' song ringing in your ears.

We're dwarfs, we're dwarfs, all doomed to die
We'll probably finish in the dragon's pie
So we'll take 'ol Bimbo Faggins, a real cement head
Hopefully 'ol Daug will eat him instead
Sing: Hog the gold! Pass the buck!
Split Bimbo's share between us.

COMMENTS

Difficulty: very playable but still some tricky bits
Graphics: a few, very average, but pleasant
Presentation: neat redesigned character set, good
Input facility: verb/noun
Response: fast Quill response

FAX BOX
Game: The Boggit
Publisher: CRL
Price: £7.95

In a hole in the Shire, which is a particularly retarded area of Muddle Earth, there lived a Boggit called Bimbo Faggins. He was a lazy fat Boggit whose only interests in life were blowing rings and watching the Elven girls go swimming down at the old mill pond. If there was one thing he was determined about, it was that he would never get caught up in one of those silly adventure games. Then he saw Grandalf the meddling old conjuror come walking down the garden path...

Yes, here they are again folks, many people's favourite adventure writers, Fergus McNeill and Judith Child. Bilbo Baggins will never be the same again... well, not with a name like Bimbo Faggins he won't. The Boggit, or Bored Too, is split into three different programs, and as we've come to expect from the Delta 4 mob there's a bonus programme as well, Sceptical II, which I'll leave you to discover for yourself.

In the first location you'll see that familiar chest, the familiar green door, with the not quite so familiar green toilet to the south. Even Boggits have to go sometime, I suppose. The door to the outside world is locked against Grandalf, but doors are no obstacle to a meddling old conjuror. He has a quest for Bimbo, and he also leaves him a gift - a box of exploding chocolates.

Don't try looking for the 'Sell by' date, just get out of the way before you're splattered, though you can try dropping them in the chest or even down the toilet if you wish. Should you try getting out of the front door, though, you'll discover it has a combination lock and the aptly named Bimbo has forgotten his combinations.

I eventually found the combinations and made it outside the front door, only to be confronted by the weird wizard again, and his even weirder friends. I was invited to 'Come on down' and answer a question before I could proceed further. There's nothing to it, however, and soon I was heading for the dark trees of the Troleslaws, where three trolls named Andre, Bernard and Matthew set about eating me without further ado, or even any HP sauce. 'Boo-tiful,' they pronounced it, too.

Avoiding them next time round (there's a handy RAM SAVE command), I wandered down some drab mountain paths and found a credit card, a Trusscard no less, though no Truss Savings Bank. I found Smelrond's House and the Wiffy Mountains, but when venturing into a cave I was arrested and thrown into... oh no! No, please! Not... but yes, it's the Goblins' Dungeon, tastefully decorated with the words 'Everyone woz 'ere' on the wall. This is the start of Part Two of the adventure, and you save your data from the end of one part and load it into the next (or you can travel back to an earlier part too). Having discovered nothing but sand in the dungeon, and being unable to summon anyone to help me, I thought I'd be smart and move on to Part Three. No chance! There Bimbo can't do anything and can't move in any direction. Curse you, Delta 4!

The usual humour is packed in, such as the response to GET ALL or the input of four-letter words (and you can safely BREAK WIND in this one, if you choose). There's more than a passing reference to Infocom adventures, that'll be lost on most Spectrum owners, but from what I've seen of the game so far it's got everything we've come to expect from Delta 4 and a few new tricks besides. Don't just Boggit, buy it!

Label: CRL
Author: Delta 4
Price: £7.95
Memory: 48K/128K
Reviewer: Richard Price

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard the Executive Suite of this giant TWA eagle.

"We'll be flying through nauseating turbulence and at varying heights above the devastated landscape of Muddle Earth. If you feel well enough you can look down and see the hovels of Bogginton, the prefabricated Halls of Rivendull and the foothills of the Wiffy Mountains.

"We hope you enjoy the flight - you'll find the sick bags underneath the Eagle's tail feathers..."

Bimbo of course is the star - if that's the right word - of Delta 4's The Boggit, the latest bad-taste epic from the team who brought you fear and loathing in Bored of the Rings.

Undaunted by public health warnings and threats of legal action, Fergus McNeil and his crew have produced a new three-parter that's almost, but not quite, entirely unlike a certain other game about dragons and small creatures with hairy feet.

How like that Other Game it is will become quickly obvious when you load up and see the first screen. There's the familiar boggit-hovel with its little green door, though the little green toilet may come as a bit of a shock to the faint-hearted.

How unlike that other game it is you'll discover as soon as that old charlatan Grandalf appears, as fond of a bit of firework fun as ever. In he leaps, breaking the window, to drop off a box of exploding chocolates for the unwary Bimbo - all to the tune of the Milk Tray advert.

Terror-stricken, you may well try to get out of the boggit-hole as fast as you can. Sorry... the door's got a combination lock on it. Until you explore the hole thoroughly, you'll never find a way out and risk dying either from hunger of from the exploding sweeties.

Once escaped... well, I'll pass over the meeting with Thorny the Dwarf and his ultra-violent comrades and the infamous The Price is Right sequence. Suffice to say that good old Grandalf is the possessor of Drain the Dwarfs map of Daug's den, filched from the demented dwarf whilst he was an in-patient at the necromancer's lunatic asylum. After an acrimonious dispute between Grandalf and Thorny they make it clear to Bimbo that he's the one who's going to risk repeated meetings with the Grim Reaper in his quest for Daug's treasure.

In your trip through Wilberland and Berkwood you'll run into many familiar scenes, like the trolls' clearing, Smelrond's prefabs at Rivendull. even the Goblin's Dungeon and the fearsome spiders of Berkwood. Bored may have been a gas but The Boggit is much slicker. Much more to do, much more to read.

Like Delta 4's earlier effort it's a trilogy written on The Quill, this time with Patched graphics and a format which will let you return back to Boggiton in Part One after you've defeated Daug in Part Three. After all, you've got to get that stolen loot into the chest to win.

You simply load in your saved positions and retrace your steps back through the first two parts.

As usual with Delta 4, it's the zany humour and irreverence that turns this game from just another spoof into an inevitably classic piece of tomfoolery.

Apart from the daft descriptions, absurdly parodising the 'heroic' computer adventure, there are the equally silly responses : "Exam sword: the sword was plain save for 'He-Man' written on the blade".

Or this when two old friends meet. 'Hi Smelly'smiled Grandalf. 'Up yours, dragonbreath' retorted Smelrond lovingly!"

Or the score, given in a currency which Elite players might prefer to exchange for something a little more useful: "For your attempts you are worth 76 Lenslok devices." Aren't you shuddering?

The descriptions themselves, often quite lengthy, veer from the odd to the odder and are often accompanied by further reams of repartee. Try this - "He woke to the sound of Grandalf announcing something:'... lucky contestant Bimbo Faggins, COME ON DOWN!' Aided and abetted by the dwarfs, Bimbo came on down. 'Bimbo Faggins, we have here a 14th share of Thorny's dwarvish treasure. How much do you think it's worth?' "Such horror and you're still only in the second location!

Then there are the objects, many of them as bizarrely out of place as the messages - the credit card to buy your duty free on the small boat, the nylon clothes-line that doubles as a rope, or the poisoned marmalade sandwich, the purpose of which may be revealed if you look carefully around Smelrond's unwholesome base. As usual you can carry vast quantities of rubbish around with you and it's a great joy to rummage through the ever-accumulating pile for something that might just be useful to get out of the particular hole you're currently stuck in.

There are diversions - in Part Two you can, by entering the right requests, transport yourself to other realms, far distant in time and space. You'll probably have little trouble in finding the password if you're familiar with Delta's other masterpieces.

The problems and puzzles, although, they sometimes seem incidental to the wealth of foolery in the storyline, are still cunning. You have to pay very close attention to the text messages to work them out and, even then, many are still not at all obvious. Official help is rarely available but the clues are all there. Don't skip bits of text in your over confidence.

Knowledge of The H****t may well come in useful but please don't assume you'll skip through The Boggit just because you knew how to get out of the Goblin's Dungeon. You'll be brought up time and again by some twist of bizarre alternative reality.

I'm not ashamed to admit that I adore Delta 4's craziness. Not everyone will go for this sort of humour, but who cares?

If you enjoyed Bored you'll be just as pleased with The Boggit.

It's just as funny and sick as its predecessor but is better presented and a whole lot snappier.

It's miles better than the game it lampoons too.

SUPPLIER: Delta 4
MACHINE: Spectrum 48K, Commodore 64, Amstrad
PRICE: £7.95

Boggit is to Hobbit what Very Big Cave is to Colossal Caves, but even less respectable.

Starting off in your tunnel-like burrow, before you can get very far, Grandalf crashes in, straight through the closed window, and deposits a box of exploding chocolates at your feet.

Dealing with this problem is not too difficult, and before long you are on your way - if you can get a word in edgeways!

The action is frequently interrupted with screenfuls of humorous narrative, in which, among other things, you are asked to "Come on down!" and guess the value of one fourteenth of Thorny's treasure.

As well as the round green door in the tunnel, there is a round green toilet, and this is the first toilet I've come across in an adventure that can actually be used for the purpose for which it was made.

Scott Adams was responsible for two flushable toilets, one in The Count, the other in Pyramid. The latter manifested itself as a throne, on which sat a formidable iron statue. Chain-pulling was necessary to find a hidden exit. Telarium's Perry Mason and this month's Beer Hunter (see review) are among the more recent toilets to have featured in an adventure.

But here at last is the first functional toilet to accept a couple of plain English commands in four letters, beginning with an S or a C. From its murky depths it disgorges an ugly monster, to bite the unsuspecting adventurer in a most tender place before disappearing again with a gurgling sound!

Your journey, in the company of Thorny and Grandalf, takes you towards Rivendull, after a brush with some trolls who in real life, figured in some of Fergus McNeill's less happy business dealings.

A visit to Beorn's house offers up some marmalade sandwiches, whilst if you call in on Smelrond, you will probably catch him in the act. Looking up from a tall elf, he will generously give you a packed lunch, which may prove a whole lot more nutritious than Beorn's feast.

Eventually you find yourself in a Goblin's dungeon, complete with high window. If you are lucky, a little upper-level-dungeon cleaner robot will appear, and reveal a bluish trapdoor...

Boggit comes in three parts, and a tape save must be made to pass between them. Being given the option to move on does not necessarily mean you have the wherewithall to succeed in the next part. There is a RAM SAVE option which can be used locally in each part.

Graphics are pleasing and effective, neatly edged with a couple of swords rampant, and not forced upon the player at every location.

Boggit shows a surer touch, and greater confidence in approach, than its predecessor Bored. Some of the jokes are quite subtle, and the text has occasionally to be read a second time, to check whether it really means what you thought it meant, or if it is just your twisted mind at work!

As a bonus, there is a 'freebie' program included on the tape. Sceptical II, is a 200 page Ceefax lookalike, bringing you inside information on the Delta 4 crowd.

If you've met them, I have, you'll realise that the names dropped are all real people. It gives you the lowdown on all the village scandal.

CBM64/Amstrad 6128/Spectrum 48K
CRL Group plc
Adventure
£7.95

With the imminent re-release of The Hobbit it seems only natural that Fergus McNeil and Co, those masters of the spoof clone, should release The Boggit. Once again McNeil puts his tongue firmly in his cheek and takes the mickey out of an established adventure but, as Kenny Everett would say, "all in the best possible taste".

For anybody who has neither read nor played The Hobbit, briefly the plot centres on Bilbo's attempts to travel across Middle Earth accompanied by Thorin, who tends to be a pain at times. His task is to find and defeat Smaug the Dragon, then return home safely with Smaug's treasure. What McNeil and co-writer Judith Childs have done is to take the original idea and then weave their inimitable brand of humour into it - and a very funny romp it is.

From the moment Grandalf crashes through your front-room window, Tarzan-like, the adventure starts to bubble. Your first problem is to get out of your front room. Once having accomplished that, it is off to visit the Trolls Clearing and have fun with Bernard and Matthew, the most unlikely trolls I have ever had the misfortune to meet, especially when they start to mutter such gems as "He'd look lovely in my crispy batter" or "Bootiful" and guess who they would like to see in the crispy batter?

Text descriptions are more than adequate and the graphics are instant and well-defined. One thing which I thought stood out in the game was the fact that the programmers seem to have looked for a long time at the establishment and adventurers in general and do not miss a trick in taking a large swipe at it - even TV games shows are included. Does "Come on down" ring any bells? In saying that, it is not meant as criticism, merely an observation; adventures should be fun to play and with the likes of Delta 4 on the scene, I can see sacred cows of adventuring slowly being tossed aside.

My one fear is that with so many clone-type adventures becoming available, it could lead to a general decline in original games. Let us hope that Delta 4 now moves to something of more original content because, when all is said and done, that is what adventuring is about.

C.R.L.
£7.95

No matter what the publicity says, The Boggit is a direct spoof of Melbourne House's game as much as Tolkien's book. Or is it a rip-off? It's a thin line between the two which author Fergus McNeil doesn't always walk successfully, certain problems being identical. That said, The Boggit is one of the best adventures I've reviewed this year.

The sheer daftness of the humour is what appealed to many people about McNeil's previous mainstream releases like Bored Of The Rings, and devotees will be pleased to know the same zaniness occurs here. At the start Bimbo Faggins has secured himself in his hole; determined to avoid any of those increasingly popular adventures. Before long, meddling old Grandalf crashes through a window, deposits a message with a self destruction box of chocolates and swiftly exits, all to the tune of the Milk Tray ads. When you eventually leave your home you are battered by Thorny and a bunch of dwarves into participating in Grandalf's peculiar version of 'The Price is Right'.

Soon the dwarves sing a charming song about how they're taking you (who they call "lardball" and 'Cement head") along on their mission (which I hardly need detail) so the dragon will eat you instead of them. Later you'll encounter the highly dubious Smelrond, the River Anadin ("great torrents of soluble pain relief roared quietly by') and my personal favourites, the spiders who bob around "most convincingly" on elastic bands. Perhaps unsurprisingly, lavatories also feature strongly. The humour isn't to everyone's taste - I didn't find it hilarious - but there should be something to make most people smile.

Vocabulary is mostly friendly, with the exception of the word CLIMB, which is often used instead of ENTER, eg., CLIMB INTO CHEST. The ever useful RAM SAVE/LOAD option is included.

The split screen graphics are all extremely attractive; with the exception of Adventure International's, I'd say they're the best I've seen. Many of them are close copies of Melbourne House's, and somehow manage to be both uncannily accurate and an improvement on the original.

There's more text than in the original too, with quite long, usually witty, location descriptions, verbose messages. Some events are described by several pages of text. The game is not always as responsive as I would have liked, but EXAMINE is usually productive and you're allowed to do plenty of irrelevant actions. Another nice feature is the characters who wander round in convincingly independent style; there's a clever TALK routine too. And yes, Thorny does sit down and sing about gold - though his song is somewhat cruder in this game.

There's lots to see but not that much to do in the way of actual problems. There's one real stumper close to the start, otherwise it's fairly logical. You must pay close attention to everything you're told though.

This game has virtually all the features I expect from an adventure, and shows how powerful The Quill utilities con be. Because there's so much, the game is in three parts; you can move freely between them reloading SAVED positions. A little inconvenient but far better than having less game.

There are a few bugs and the game is no masterpiece; but despite its faults The Boggit is an extremely enjoyable and professional adventure.

As the Crash annuals are still for sale ZXSR has taken the decision to remove all review text, apart from reviewer names and scores from the database. A backup has been taken of the review text which is stored offsite. The review text will not be included without the express permission of the Annuals editorial team/owners.